10 Fingers & 10 Toes

via Flickr”]20061126_DHo_baby feet (11)_B&W_ps

Often, in the “Do you want a boy or girl?” conversation, one innocent phrase pops up at the conclusion…

“As long as he or she has 10 fingers and 10 toes, right?”

or a phrase similar to it.  (“As long as it’s healthy, we don’t care what the gender.”)

A few weeks ago, I had such a phrase interjected into one of my conversations.  I smiled politely without thinking twice about the statement; but now I’m not so sure I agree.  Actually, I don’t agree with it all.

You see, I believe that even those people born with disabilities, diseases, abnormalities, and mental handicaps have been shaped and created by God.   I may not understand why God allows these things to exist, but I do know every person, no matter his capabilities or health, has a purpose in life and is cherished just as much as any healthy person.

I pray daily for our child’s health… but if our son or daughter should be born without 10 fingers or toes, or not “perfectly healthy”, my love for him or her will not diminish.

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Boy or Girl?

This baby is one month old.

Image via Wikipedia

Lately I’ve been asked quite frequently whether I feel the baby is a boy or girl.  It’s weird, but my feelings have changed.  In the beginning, I felt it was a girl and could only think of girl names and decorations.  However, about 6 weeks ago I started thinking “boy” and couldn’t focus on anything girly.  Either way, we’ll be happy.

Along with being asked what I think, I get a lot of guesses…”You seem to carrying low, so I think it’s a girl.”  (or, I’ve even heard the exact opposite…that since it seems I’m carrying low, I’ll probably have a boy).

“Craving sweets? – it’s a girl.”

“It’s a boy…I’ve dreamed it!”

And so it continues on.

I really do enjoy the guesses; it’s part of the fun.  So in keeping with spirit, I decided to go through the wives’ tales that are supposed to determine if the baby’s a girl or boy. Below is a list that I found on ivillage.com with the supposed gender determinants.  Next to each symptom I’ve placed a YES or NO depending on if I’ve experienced it.  (I’ve deleted a few really personal ones about my nipples and urine.  Not sure you really want to hear about that!)

It’s a boy if:

  • You didn’t experience morning sickness in early pregnancy.  YES
  • Your baby’s heart rate is less than 140 beats per minute.  NO
  • You are carrying the extra weight out front. (NOT SURE WHAT THIS MEANS REALLY…BUT, YES?)
  • Your belly looks like a basketball. UM…YES?  A SMALL ONE…
  • You are carrying low.  YES
  • You are craving salty or sour foods. YES
  • You are craving protein — meats and cheese. YES
  • Your feet are colder than they were before pregnancy. NO
  • The hair on your legs has grown faster during pregnancy. NOT REALLY, MY HAIR’S ALWAYS GROWN ANNOYINGLY FAST!
  • Your hands are very dry. NO
  • Your pillow faces north when you sleep.  WHAT?  BASED ON WHICH SIDE OF THE PILLOW?  IF IT’S BASED ON THE OPENING OF THE PILLOW COVER…THEN, YES.
  • Dad-to-be is gaining weight right along with you. DOESN’T LOOK LIKE IT, SO, NO.
  • Pregnancy has you looking better than ever. UM…NO… UNLESS YOU THINK OF A WIDENING BUTT AS “LOOKING BETTER”! (yes, I know I’m pregnant & it comes with the joy of becoming a mother…but it doesn’t mean I have to like the idea of the weight gain.  In fact, this has been the hardest part for me).
  • Your nose is spreading. OH NO!! DOES THIS HAPPEN IN PREGNANCY TOO?!?!  NOT YET FOR ME, AT LEAST.
  • You hang your wedding ring over your belly and it moves in circles. LOL!! I JUST DID THIS FOR THE FIRST TIME…AND IT WENT IN CIRCLES BUT THEN STOOD STILL WHEN I MOVED IT AWAY FROM MY BELLY!
  • You are having headaches. YES.  JUST RECENTLY STARTED.
  • You add your age at the time of conception and the number for the month you conceived and the sum is an even number. NOPEIT’S AN ODD #.

It’s a girl if:

  • You had morning sickness early in pregnancy. NO
  • Your baby’s heart rate is at least 140 beats per minute.  YES.
  • You are carrying the weight in your hips and rear. NO
  • Your left breast is larger than your right breast.  🙂   NO.
  • Your hair develops red highlights. NO
  • You are carrying high.    NO.
  • Your belly looks like a watermelon.  YES?  IDK…WHAT KIND OF WATERMELON? SOME ARE PRETTY ROUND LIKE A BASKETBALL!
  • You are craving sweets. YES!  CAN YOU SAY “BANANA SPLIT”?
  • You are craving fruit. YES!  EVEN GRAPES, WHICH I DON’T EVEN REALLY LIKE.
  • You crave orange juice. NOT REALLY. BUT I’VE ALWAYS DRANK A BUNCH OF JUICE SINCE I WAS A LITTLE GIRL.
  • You don’t look quite as good as normal during pregnancy.  YESMY FACE IS BREAKING OUT & I’VE ALWAYS HAVE CLEAR, CLEAR SKIN!
  • You are moodier than usual during pregnancy. YES.  MY HUSBAND, MOM AND STUDENTS WILL CONFIRM THIS ONE!
  • Your face breaks out more than usual. YES.  JUST RECENTLY.
  • You refuse to eat the heel of a loaf of bread.  YES.  BUT THIS IS NOTHING NEW; I’VE NEVER EATEN THE HEEL.
  • Your breasts have really blossomed!  NOPE. NOT YET.  😦
  • Your pillow faces south when you sleep.  AGAIN…IDK…BUT NO, BASED ON MY PREVIOUS CONCLUSION.
  • You hang your wedding ring over your belly and it moves from side.  NO
  • You add your age at the time of conception and the number for the month you conceived and the sum is an odd number. YES
Results:
Yeses for “boy”:  9
Yeses for “girl”:  9

I guess we’ll just have to wait for the conclusive sonogram scheduled for March 10!

It Seems So Surreal

Josh and I are excited to share with you that, after 10 1/2 yrs of infertility, we are pregnant!  Baby Parks is scheduled to arrive the first week of August 2011!!

Thanks for all your prayers and support.

A Must-See Video

I saw the following video on a blog that I follow (Aspire2) and had to share it.  It’s a must see…and then go hug your children and pray for those who never had a chance to enjoy this life God has blessed us with.

(for some reason, I can’t get it to embed…so to view video click HERE and then press play on the video.)

My Struggle with Infertility and Mother’s Day

This Sunday is a big day for many women – Mother’s Day.  I’ve never had an issue celebrating this day…I have two wonderful moms in my life that deserve my attention and gratitude.  But I’m finding this Mother’s Day even more difficult than ever.

It’s been about one year since Josh and I were medically labeled “infertile.”  And it’s been a very slow year in the process of figuring out if we can even have children.  You may remember that in January we actually started the first medical procedures to possibly correct the infertility.  (You can refresh your memory by clicking HERE then HERE).  Well, tomorrow we go in for our first follow-up since the procedure.  A few tests will be done and we should know soon after whether the procedure was successful.  So, depending on those results, I may have a wonderful weekend, celebrating with growing hope that one day I will be celebrated as a mom.   But if the results show no positive progress…you may not see me at church this mother’s day…

This journey of infertility is so frustrating…just when I think I’ve come to terms with the possibility of not having children, little things chip away at my emotions until I’m suddenly an emotional wreck, and must admit “This is harder than I thought it would be”.  It doesn’t help when I’ve had 4 friends give birth in the last 6 months, have 8 (yes, eight) more friends announce pregnancies within the last 9 months, watched a baby dedication last Sunday, and now it’s Mother’s Day.  I’ve actually almost shut down my facebook account just because of all the hundreds of statuses and pictures about my friends’ wonderful children (or sometimes their naughty little ones).   Don’t get me wrong…I am sooo happy for my friends; I really do rejoice in the blessings they have in their lives…I’m not bitter, angry, or disgusted…I’m just hurting, confused, and trying to get through this…and daily reminders of this void in my life can be excruciating.

I know many of you who read this blog have children, and I know that you have genuine concern and compassion.  Sometimes in your wanting to show your concern, you say things hoping to help ease the pain…and even though I know what you say comes from from a loving, sincere heart, the things you say are often quite painful.  I read a blog this week about this issue and want to pass it along….I pray it helps guide you in how to approach & minister to a friend who’s hurting through infertility.  You can read it by clicking HERE.

Please be praying for our Dr. appointment tomorrow.  I’ll keep you updated.