Me on Mission

Hello.  My name is Lindsey and I’m an addict.

To books.

Even if I don’t ever finish reading the book, I have to buy it.

Half Price Books feeds me my drug of choice; and when they’re offering an additional 20% of the already low prices, I can’t control myself.

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After eating out and spending several hours perusing the bookshelves of above mentioned book pusher, I noticed that I my feet seemed a little off…

I was wearing one brown shoe and one black shoe!

ALL FREAKING DAY!!! I feel like an idiot.

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I’m in the beginning stages of another addiction…

Online blog giveaways.  This is when bloggers offer wonderful prizes to people who will peruse their website or other business websites (usually small businesses that offer handmade goods or creative products).  All I have to do is leave a comment.  Super easy, super quick and they don’t use your information for anything, like spam marketing mailers.

One that I recently entered was on a site called Bloggy Giveaways.  I don’t have children, but I do have lots of nieces and friends with children, so I signed up anyways to win Ribbies Clippies.  To my surprise, I Won!!  Check out what I won by clicking the links above…they’re super cute!

So, even though I felt like a loser all day for wearing mismatched shoes…I now know that I really am a WINNER!

Wanting to keep the slenderer me, Josh and I have started cycling. On this cool morning when the sun just started to peak through the clouds, we were off to a local trail in Richardson. I’ve ridden this trail many times with my friend Liz and have never had any problems.

The ride was going smooth and I was feeling great as we came to the end of the the first half- two long descents. As I flew down the hills, crisp wind cooling off the sweat on my brow, I wasn’t thinking about the obvious – that going down the hills means that i will be going UP the hills to return to our car.

The first hill is short, but steep.  Having learned how to change gears during Wednesday night’s “Bicycle Maintenance Class”, the first climb proved fairly easy, except for the anticipated gasping-for-air moments that followed.  Before I barely had time to recover I approached the second hill, a gradual incline but much longer than the first.  It was a killer…almost literally.

When I reached the very top and came to a stop at the red light, my heart pounded so fast I thought it was going to explode.  After going through the light Josh and I got off our bikes and began walking, hoping that a slower pace would help bring my heart rate down.  Instead I became more nauseated and dizzy, feeling like I could pass out and lose my breakfast all at once.  I had to sit down. Once I sipped on my water and relaxed for about 10 minutes I started feeling good enough to continue on to the car.

Wrong.

Almost immediately upon returning to the bike saddle, the nauseating, stomach-twisting dizziness knocked me down.  This time, it returned twice as bad as before.  I had to get to a bathroom, but only residental houses surrounded us.  I made up my mind to walk to the nearest house, a nice brick home with a “He is Risen” cross stuck in the front yard.  Surely, they would help a dying woman.

As I walked up their front walkway, everything went blurry and started spinning.  All balance and focus disappeared and I fell to the dewy wet grass.  The pain from my stomach and chest was intense, but with the little strength within me, I lifted up my head to call for Josh.  After checking to see if I still had a pulse, he began running from door to door.  Finally, the 6th house (way down the street) opened up and allowed me to come in their home to cool down and recoop.  By this time, I had been laying in the grass unable to make any significant movement, but I was able to pull myself up and, with the help of Josh’s arm and my bike-turned-walker, I made my way to the house.

Thankfully all turned out well.  No ambulances, no broken bones, no severe trauma.  Maybe a little dehydrated…but, I’m still alive…and will climb back on my bike very soon.

Today marks 2 weeks back in Texas.  Two weeks that have been surprisingly easy – both emotionally and physically.

Most of the first week we shopped until we dropped, buying all the essentials that every American must have to survive – a car, cell phones, food, and clothes appropriate for 100 degree heat.  In all honesty, I had my moments of frustration during these shopping sprees.  I couldn’t help but think that we didn’t need all these things (except the food of course).  I’ve just spent four months without a car.  If i needed groceries, I walked to the market and back.  If I needed to go farther, I took the public bus.  Here everything is still within walking distance and we have public buses as well.  So why do we really need a car?  Because it’s the American way – it’s all about convenience, ease, and comfort.  The quicker travel time frees us up to do other important things, like watch our favorite TV show.  The cool air conditioned ride keeps us from dehydrating during the 10 minutes that it would take us to walk to the nearest Albertson’s.  The comfy cushioned seats protects our fat butts and legs from the painful side effects of excercise we’d receive during that same walk to buy potato chips and coke.  Not to mention we’re saving thousands of dollars….oh, wait…we’re not…

Don’t get me wrong.  I love that I can live in a place where luxaries are affordable and really do make life simpler and easier.  But, I hate the materialism.  I loathe the fact that WE FEEL WE MUST have a car or nice cell phones, or a closet full of trendy clothes.  I know that there’s an even balance to this issue.  It’s not necessarily bad to have these things if you can afford it.  Much good can come from them if you are wise and prudent with what God has given to you, and don’t covet more and more.  I just feel guilty when we don’t really need these things and could put the money towards ministry or something of eternal value.

Other than that, my emotional readjustment has been fairly smooth.   I have my days where I’m sad for my return, and I still have many questions that I struggle with.  Yet, I cling to the promise that all is going to be okay…and I know it will.

After 20 hours of worldwide traveling (including 10 hours with non-stop screaming children and rude flight attendants), we are now in our home in Texas.  It’s a weird feeling…I did not expect to be here again for a long time, and especially not here to live.  Yet, as we all know, life changes and sometimes we go in directions that take us to unexpected places.

I haven’t blogged much about the move, because, honestly, I don’t know what to say.  There are so many things going on in my heart and in my head, and I daily have to check my heart.  I’m learning to live by God’s Scriptures; to guide my actions, thoughts, and words based on Biblical truths and not by my own emotions.  It’s a hard thing to do – to surrender my own feelings – but it’s the right thing to do.

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Over the next week or so, you will see changes to this blog.  It will move more towards a personal blog about me: life, thoughts, events, ministry, readjustments.  It will definitely get more personal into my mind.  I hope you keep reading.

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One last thank you for sticking by us through the last 2 1/2 years.  You have been there through all of our ups and downs, praying all along the way.  The kind words of encouragement have helped make those down times a bit easier and kept us energized during the up times.  God has truly blessed us with amazing friends and family…and even blessed us through people we don’t know!  Our deepest love and gratitude go out to you!